By LEANNDRA PADGETT
When choosing a meat to serve at Christmas dinner, ham should be the obvious decision. The reasons for this are threefold. First, turkey is for Thanksgiving. Second, ham is good. Third, my family always has ham and they’re surely right!
November is the time for turkey; nothing is sweeter than a fall bird. By December, however, it is time for a change. American consumers have eaten their fill (or more than their fill) of turkey by the time Christmas rolls around and are ready for ham, the meat of winter. Consider the children’s snack pigs-in-blankets. This is a pork sausage wrapped in a roll of dough. Have you ever heard of turkey-in-a-blanket? Of course not! Pigs are able to prepare for the winter and are therefore more fitting for the later and colder of the two holidays. After Thanksgiving, whatever turkeys that have survived are cold and unfit to eat. The pigs have been fattening up for months and are wisely wrapped in blankets. Therefore, ham is the obvious choice.
Secondly, ham is good. Imagine a savory side of ham, glazed with honey and baked to perfection. Picture a platter piled high with Christmas side dishes, culminating with the meat of champions. Ham is the only way to finish Advent.
Finally, ham should be eaten at Christmas because that’s what my family always does. They are smart; they are knowledgeable. How could they have made such a grave mistake over so many generations if ham was not the correct choice?
Make the right decision this Christmas: eat ham. Your country depends on you. Only you can prevent turkey consumption. Eat ham upon a midnight clear. The stars in the sky look down where he lay, the little Lord Jesus eating ham in the hay. Sweet, sweet, delicious ham.